Teaching Children Compassion: 4 Easy Hands-on Ways
We often hear that parents must serve as role models for
their children. "Monkey See, Monkey Do." Therefore, it's
important for parents to demonstrate ways to be
compassionate at home. After all, when parents show
kindness, their children will learn kindness. When parents
show intolerance, impatience, and injustice, children will
learn to behave in the same ways.
Here are some hands-on examples of ways parents can model
compassion so that their children will follow:
1. Teaching Compassion for Other Family Members
Scenario: It's the weekend. Mom and Dad have been doing
chores all day long. Both are tired. When they decide to
call it quits for the day, Mom offers Dad something cold to
drink and they sit together on the couch. Dad massages
Mom's feet after a long day.
Effect: Little Matt sees that both Mom and Dad feel for and
understand each other. Little Matt learns what empathy and
compassion look like. He also sees the positive effects
such kindness has on others.
Learning Moment: Talk to Matt about the importance of
showing compassion to others in the family. Even if you're
tired or even if you're a child, you can still show
kindness is easy, helpful ways. These acts of kindness make
people feel good inside' both the receiver and the giver!
Participation: Let Little Matt bring a cookie for Dad or
let him massage Mom's fingers. These little ways of
contributing to others will send the signal to Little Matt
that he can make others feel good by showing compassion.
2. Teaching Compassion for Animals
Having pets in the home is a great way to teach children
compassion.
Scenario: Polly the cockatoo is making a raucous in her
stand. Mom checks her out, sees the seed bin empty, and the
water cup empty. Mom cleans the containers, places some
seeds and pours fresh water.
Effect: Little Matt understands that if pets need and
deserve attention.
Learning moment: Explain to Little Matt that the bird
became noisy because it couldn't fend for itself and she
was hungry. Just like when he was a little baby, and he was
hungry, he would cry. Mom treats Polly as a member of the
family who needs caring, Little Matt would treat Polly in
the same way.
Participation: Assign Matt to be the "listener" for Polly's
cries or the "food checker" every other day. When able, he
can put seeds and pour water into the container.
3. Teaching Compassion for Playmates Scenario: While
playing in your backyard, Little Matt's friend, Tommy,
bruises his knee and starts crying. Mom washes his bruises,
blowing to keep the pain away, and placing antiseptic to
make sure the bruise doesn't get infected. All this time,
Mom explains to Matt what she is doing.
Effect: Little Matt sees the pain in his friend and sees
Mom try her best to take the pain away. Again, Little Matt
learns empathy and compassion.
Learning Moment: When our friends get hurt, we need to stop
what we're doing and take care of the. That means helping
them when they trip or getting an adult when they need some
extra assistance.
Participation: Let Little Matt join in blowing the pain
away. He can also get the band-aid out of the cabinet or
the cotton-ball out of the container.
4. Teaching Compassion for Those In Need
Scenario: One of the local charities called and they're
doing a big clothing drive. Mom and Dad start putting their
old or unworn clothes into bags and marking them "Charity."
Matt's Mom explains what she's doing. Matt's Dad tells his
son that the clothes are going to people who need clothes
but are unable to buy them.
Effect: Little Matt sees that his parents participate in
giving to charity. He will likely want to join in and help
the people in need as well.
Learning Moment: Matt's parents teach him that there are
many children that rely on nice little boys and girls for
toys, clothes, and household goods. While he may not like
his Sesame Street Comforter Set anymore and he may not read
his "board books" anymore, other little boys and girls may
love them! What can he give away to help others?
Participation: Matt can put his clothes from last year that
he no longer wears, into a bag for charity. His parents
tell him that his clothes are going to other little boys
who will love everything Matt gives to them! They will be
thinking, "thank you, Matt!"
Each time we take a moment to include our children in the
process of giving to others and showing compassion to
others, they learn valuable lessons about kindness and
empathy that will stay with them for the rest of their
lives.
Start early—start today!
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Known as "The Character Queen," Dr. Robyn Silverman is a
parenting expert and child development specialist. Her
tips-based style makes her a favorite among parents and
teachers. She's the creator of the Powerful Words Character
Toolkit, a character education system used in children's
programs. For more information or to contact Dr. Robyn,
visit her Powerful Parenting Blog at
http://www.DrRobynsBlog.com or website at
http://wwwDrRobynSilverman.com
